Sneaker Nightmares: Track Your Package Here

An AM Flight, Dior AJ1s, and Disaster come together for a trip never to be forgotten

Community, Real Talk Designer SOPHIA CHANG Writer L CARDENAS

Sneaker Nightmares bringing to life footwear’s biggest fears

This Tale From The Crypt is the nightmare of Sara Gilbert; The year is 2020. Remember that 12-month perpetual loop of tragedy? Yeah, that one. The month is August, and the weather is the opposite of cold, so for New Yorkers, it was a beautiful month. For Sara, that month got even better when she got word that her sneaker collection was about to be blessed by the presence of the Dior Jordan 1 Lows. From that day on her doorman would face a daily 5-min interrogation on the status of her delivery. Each day all she heard from him was, "Nope, nothing for you today."

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Fast forward two weeks, Sara books a last-minute 3-day business trip #jetsetter to Atlanta, Georgia, with an 8am call time the day after she lands. At 4 pm, Sara hits the road to Newark Airport to catch her 7 pm flight. Her speakers are blasting and her hair is blowing in the wind when all of a sudden her phone receives the notification she has been waiting for: "Your Package Has Been Delivered." Sara turns down the music because that helps you read better of course, pulls the car over, and quickly realizes her package was dropped at her old address in Brooklyn.

If you know you know, the New York package game hits different. Living at her old apartment, she experienced numerous packages and a bike stolen from the front of her building in broad daylight. Which meant there was only one option: to turn the car the f*ck around two and a half hours before her flight boarded. Let's just say Sara went tailgating, no BBQ included, and FLOORED IT back to Brooklyn.

Fueled by fear and road rage, an hour later she arrives at her destination and, leaving the car running, makes a run for it. Sitting on the stoop of her building is her package. Just sitting outside practically asking to be stolen. FedEx might as well have put up a sign saying "FREE PACKAGE. COME STEAL ME!"

But alas, there's a happy ending to this nightmare-turned-dream. Two speeding tickets later and enough sweat for a Gatorade commercial, Sara is buying a blanket to wrap her sneakers in and wiping tears of fear from her eyes as she begins to board her flight.